My Birth Experience - Part One

** Warning: This is my birth experience including as many details as I remember. If you have a weak tummy when it comes to needles and words like cervix or vagina, I recommend you read a different blog. ;-)

I know it's been almost three months since my boys were born, but this is the first chance I've had to sit down and write about their arrival. As you know I was very specific about how I wanted this birth to go, but also tried to keep an open mind since after an emergency c-section with my first birth I learned first hand how quickly plans can change.

So here is my second birth experience.

I was almost 38 weeks and my Doctor and I decided to go ahead and induce labor before my big healthy babies got too big. My doctor, who has a wonderful VBAC rate, assured me we would take things slow and be very careful so that I would have the most chance for a successful VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean).

At just past midnight the morning of Monday, November 8th we were admitted and taken to our first labor room where our goal was to reach 5 cm dilated so we could move to the bigger (and nicer, with a window even!) labor room just down the hall from the OR where we would be delivering regardless, just in case.

We were nervous but excited that we were finally going to meet these two amazing people growing inside of me. My nurse introduced herself and gave us the rundown. Then she got things going by attempting to start my IV and her attempt on my left arm didn't work because apparently she hit a valve. Instead of continuing to poke me, she went and got a fellow nurse to try to get my IV on the second try. She found a vein on my right arm, started to do her thing and then stopped and sighed as she apologized that apparently she blew out the vein. Which just meant that I was going to have an ugly bruise later and still needed an IV. A third nurse came in and promised to do her best to make the third time a charm and using my hand instead, she placed the catheter right in and my IV was finally in place.

So began the pitocin, nice and slow to be safe, and IV fluids to keep me hydrated now that I shouldn't eat, except italian ice, or drink, except ice chips, in case the labor (read drugs) made me nauseous.

By now it was around 2am and we were settled in for the long haul. I was still having trouble with my left hip as I had throughout my pregnancy and laying in the bed was making it worse. Walking probably wouldn't have helped, but even it if had it was pretty much out of the question as I was attached to fetal monitors at all times. I wish I could say I slept during those first wee hours, but since every time my nurse left the room one of the babies got mischievous and moved away from their monitor sending the machine into a panic LOL! our nurses got to know us very well. By 9am my babies were famous for their antics.

Every time I went to the bathroom I had to have help because my hip was hurting more and more. Walking on it hurt, lying down hurt. Nothing seemed to help.

My contractions were increasing to a steady rhythm with the help of the pitocin I was feeling them, uncomfortable at first and then moving to quite uncomfortable, but certainly tolerable.

My hip however was not.

With the IV making sure I was well hydrated I was getting up to pee every hour or so and with each trip walking became more and more difficult. My husband was helping me out of bed to take the five minute walk the five feet from the bed each time and he could tell I was struggling more and more.

By the time early afternoon arrived I was having so much pain when I walked that I didn't care about the growing intensity of contractions. Those I could handle, but I thought this hip thing was going to be the end of me.

Finally, on what felt like my 30th trip to the bathroom about 12 hours into my induction I couldn't take it anymore. I had made it to the bathroom with my IV pole and gone pee, but was in tears at the thought of having to stand again, much less walk all the way back to my bed. I looked at my husband, tears starting to pour down my cheeks and told him I wanted an epidural.

This was my pain threshold. I had reached it in 12 hours and it had nothing to do with labor! Talk about plans changing.

My Dad was in town for the birth and had been keeping us company as my contractions increased, talking and joking, helping to encourage and distract. As soon as the anesthesiologist arrived he took a walk. I wished I could join him.

I had seen oodles of epidurals performed during my obsessive pregnant days watching every birth reality show on tv. I had even seen a woman fall asleep in the middle of hers. Which I actually did when I got my spinal block before my emergency c-section when my daughter was born. Weird.

All I could think about was how much my hip hurt and how much I wanted it to stop. I knew we were still at the beginning of this adventure and I was exhausted.

I knew exactly what they were doing and tried to pretend I didn't.

My husband stood in front of me, not a nurse. I don't think a dozen large and burly men could have removed him from that spot. He really was amazing.

This was nothing like I had imagined. It was so much...well worse. I can't think of a better word.

Being a learning hospital there were two people behind me. One was doing it while the other coached her through it. She didn't seem like this was her first rodeo, and two to make sure everything was going right sounded good to me.

When she finished putting the cold brown stuff, antiseptic, on my back and did the local it was just like I remembered last time. A slight bee sting and then a warm feeling. But then everything changed. When she put the needle into my back for the epidural I nearly had a panic attack sitting there.

The only way I can describe it is that it just felt wrong. Not that she was doing it wrong, but think about it. A needle being pushed into the space between your vertebrae along your spinal chord into the fluid surrounding it. There is nothing right about that.

I started to shake and panic. Tears were pouring down my face, I didn't know if I could keep it together.

Then my wonderful husband leaned his forehead again mine and coached me through it. He was amazing.

Once they were done, which seemed to be hours later, I was able to sit back and all the 'weirdness' that had caused the shaking and tears just went away, like waking up from a bad dream. I felt a little silly for crying and shaking, but they were very supportive. Epidural in place I soon was a very happy Mama to Be with a hip that I couldn't feel anymore.

At the end of the day I was still no more than 2 cm. Which is all the further I had gone with my daughter. My OB stopped by to check in and pick on me for looking so comfy when I was supposed to be in labor.

He said they were going to turn down, even off, the pitocin until the next morning and give me a break. He even said I could finally have some solid food. Yeah!

Since this was about 9 o'clock at night, the kitchen sent up what they had in the way of a quickly made veggie plate. Lots of veggies and fruit. I was in heaven. I didn't make it through much as my appetite was small after no real food in so many hours, but I did eat more than I thought I would as my wonderful husband fed me bite after bite. I was so tired, I probably wouldn't have eaten more than a few bites on my own. Lifting that fork just felt like so much work! LOL

We tried to sleep that night, with my epidural in place my hip was behaving, but we still spent most of the night getting to know our nurses as our night nurse then got the trouble babies on the floor who like to get chased by monitors at all hours. Already famous for staying in one place just long enough for the nurse to think she's got them before moving as soon as she gets down the hall and setting off alarms that bring her right back to us, our babies were making quite the impression and they weren't even born yet!

That was Day One, as it were, of our birth experience.

Stay tuned for Part Two of our birth experience!!!